Overcoming Despair

When my son was much younger, he had a problem with wandering away from me in stores or other public places. I warned him repeatedly not to do this. Once again, I saw him wander off out of the corner of my eye. Out of frustration, I let him go. Of course, I followed close behind him, just out of his sight to see what he would do. He was fine for a few minutes. Then it happened – he looked up and no one he knew was around. It was at that moment that he experienced utter despair, a time where he was really alone and lost. He burst into tears and cried out for "Daddy," at which time I burst onto the scene to rescue him. After assuring him I had been watching the whole time, I pointed out again why it was so important for him to stay with me. He never wandered off again.

Have you ever experienced a time of despair?

A time of loneliness when no one was around who seemed to care about you.
A time of sickness when you were unable to be with people you loved.
A time of tragedy when your world seemed to collapse around you.
A time of persecution when people were attacking and ridiculing you.

Despair happens to all people at various times for different reasons. Yet knowing this does not really help when you are going through such a time. Some even call it a "wilderness" experience – a time of spiritual dryness where God seems distant and uncaring. This is the place where Psalm 42-43 were written. Though it is attributed to the "Sons of Korah" (Psalm 42:1, NIV), it seems to relate events that happened in the life of David, King of Israel. Of David, the LORD said he was, "a man after My own heart; he will do everything I want him to do" (Acts 13:22, NIV). In any event, this Psalm speaks of a godly man going through a time of great despair. How does he you deal with despair? How do you get through such a time?

Scripture: Psalm 42-43

Main Thought: When despair sets in, the best solution is to look up and trust in what you know is true about God our Creator.

A Longing to Worship God (Psalm 42:1-4).
Chorus 1 - Trust in God My Savior (Psalm 42:5-6a).
The pain of separation and oppression is too much to bear (Psalm 42:6b-10).
Chorus 2 - Trust in God My Savior (Psalm 42:11).
A plea for deliverance from the lies of wicked men (Psalm 43:1-4).
Chorus 3 - Trust in God My Savior (Psalm 43:5).

1. A longing to worship God.

As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, "Where is your God?" These things I remember as I pour out my soul: how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house of God, with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng (Psalm 42:1-4, NIV).

The Psalmist uses a word picture to describe a well-known condition during times of despair. He is experiencing an unquenchable thirst for God. Taunted by his enemies, unable to gather with God’s people for worship, he thirsts for "the living God" (Psalm 42:1, NIV).

He is not looking for a religious ceremony.
He is not looking for Bible verses.
He is not desirous of personal comfort.

He wants nothing less than the very real and comforting presence of the living God!

So what does he do? First of all, he remembers. He thinks back on the wonderful times of worship he has enjoyed in times past. Rather than focus on the present "low" times, he forces himself to think back to the spiritual "high" times:

How I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng.
(Psalm 42:1-4, NIV).

Obviously he had the good fortune of actually leading in the worship and celebration of God. This was a spiritual high time that lifted his emotions out of despair and into the joy of the LORD.

2. Chorus 1 - Trust in God my Savior.

Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:5-6a, NIV)

In longing to worship God, he remembers the high times past. As a result of remembering these good times, the Psalmist wakes up and asks a very pertinent question for a man of God: Why are you downcast and disturbed? The man of God hopes in the living God who does not change, who will not leave nor will He fail!

My children chide me for talking to myself frequently. We will be in the car and one of them will shout, "You’re doing it again – I can see your lips moving!" OK, so I do ponder things and perhaps I mumble to myself. A pundit once said talking to yourself is not so bad; it’s when you start answering yourself that you get into trouble!

But reading this Psalm gives me some assurance that it’s OK to answer yourself when you draw your answers from prayerful meditation of God’s reality, His presence, and His truth. "Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him!" (Psalm 42:5, NIV) shouts the man of God. This is what the Psalmist did to deal with the emotional pain he felt. He remembered the high times and remembered that God gives him reasons to praise even during times of despair. It worked for him; it will work for you also.

3. The pain of separation and oppression is too much to bear.

My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you from the land of the Jordan, the heights of Hermon-- from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me. By day the LORD directs his love, at night his song is with me-- a prayer to the God of my life. I say to God my Rock, "Why have you forgotten me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?" My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me, saying to me all day long, "Where is your God?" (Psalm 42:6b-10, NIV)

Let’s be honest at this point. When real despair sets in, it often stays for a very long time (sort of like a bad haircut). The Psalmist acknowledges this reality: "My soul is downcast within me…" (Psalm 42:6b, NIV). He is physically far from Jerusalem where he desires to worship God with the throngs of godly men and women who gather there. He feels spiritually far from God as "all your waves and breakers have swept over me" (Psalm 42:7, NIV). He remembers that God’s love is constant and unchanging toward him (Psalm 42:8). Yet he honestly cries out to God asking why God has forgotten him (Psalm 42:9). He reels with the agony of taunts from his enemies who wag their heads at him, "where IS your God?" (Psalm 42:10, NIV emphasis mine).

This man is in serious pain. In every way -- mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually – he is suffering from deep despair. Despair treads mightily on the soul like a band of wild horses galloping along a wet path. The holes get messy and deep. The tears are a constant reminder that God has not "fixed" your problem. Who will save you from this pit? Surely, despair is more than anyone can handle…

Be careful at this point. Quite often you and I choose to delight in misery. This contradiction is not appropriate for God’s people but we do it anyway. Some call it a "pity party". Others try to justify such behavior because of the tragic circumstances. The Psalmist seems to be stuck in this back and forth wavering also. But the Bible says that we are to be people of faith who do not doubt, who do not waver:

He who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the LORD; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does. (James 1:6-7, NIV)

Despair brings the temptation to be double-minded. Believing in God who loves you and has promised to bring you home but commiserating in the misery of circumstances beyond your control. Which will it be for you?

4. Chorus 2 - Trust in God my Savior.

Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. (Psalm 42:11, NIV)

Once again, this chorus is proclaimed. The Psalmist insists on faith in God as the answer. God alone is worthy of our hope and praise. The "hope" in this verse (Hebrew yachal 3176) relates to waiting with expectancy. It is like the parent who tells the child to "hold out your hand and close your eyes." The child "hopes," waiting with certain expectation of a delightful surprise to be given. This is how the Psalmist insists on responding to his despair. He will wait with CERTAIN expectation that God, who is worthy of praise all the time, will intercede in his situation. He affirms what he believes, "I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God" (Psalm 42:11, NIV). It worked for him; it will work for you.

5. A plea for deliverance from the lies of wicked men.

Vindicate me, O God, and plead my cause against an ungodly nation; rescue me from deceitful and wicked men. You are God my stronghold. Why have you rejected me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy? Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me; let them bring me to your holy mountain, to the place where you dwell. Then will I go to the altar of God, to God, my joy and my delight. I will praise you with the harp, O God, my God. (Psalm 43:1-4, NIV)

His enemies continued to taunt him. They appeared to prosper in the face of his misery. The Psalmist points out their lies which threaten him. For the child of God in despair, the deceit is perhaps the greatest danger. Certainly the lies of other people can be terribly hurtful.

You overhear a person you think is your friend telling stories about you.
Important people in your life tell you that you have no future, that you are a nobody.
People climb the ladder of success by putting you and others down, and the boss says, "Well, that’s just the way it is in the business world."

These things are not truth to live by but they hurt greatly. The Psalmist felt this way as he poured out his heart to God. What did he ask in response to the lies, the injustice, and the threats of wicked men?

Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me; let them bring me to your holy mountain, to the place where you dwell. Then will I go to the altar of God, to God, my joy and my delight. I will praise you with the harp, O God, my God. (Psalm 43:3-4, NIV)

He refused to listen to lies. He refused to believe in the lies others told him. Instead, he cried out for God’s truth to guide him. In fact, he points out that God’s truth will lead you to the place where God dwells. The LORD Jesus Christ said, "I am the truth…no one comes to the Father except through Me" (John 14:6, NIV). So it is no wonder that His truth leads us to the presence of God. That is the wonder of the salvation message that through faith in the LORD Jesus Christ who died for your sins and rose victoriously from the grave you can enter into a personal, permanent relationship with God forever. Believing in Christ saves you for all eternity. That is secure in Christ. But He saves you in time also – don’t forget that wonderful truth as well.

Times of despair cause you to have much greater sensitivity to things that happen. You get that, "When it rains, it pours" feeling. Every little thing seems worse, quite often, than it really is. It is hard to think rationally or even to apply common sense when your emotions are torn apart. That is why the Psalmist asks God to send forth His truth. You need to remember to seek truth in your time of despair. Let your close family members or friends help you see the real truth in your situation. Even if it is a situation that cannot be understood, seek the truth about God’s unchanging character. As the Psalmist said, "by day the LORD directs His love, at night His song is with me" (Psalm 42:8, NIV). Seek the truth about God to overcome the darkness of despair.

6. Chorus 3 - Trust in God my Savior.

Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God (Psalm 43:5, NIV).

In the ancient city of Pompeii, there was a young girl called Nydia. Stricken with blindness from birth, she worked, nevertheless, to earn a living. Day after day she would walk on her own from the little hut where she lived to the place where she labored to put food on the table. Pompeii was right next to the volcano, Mt. Vesuvius. When it erupted, it spit forth ash and dust that made it impossible for anyone to see. Terrified, people rushed about blindly through the city streets. Nydia, however, calmly walked through the streets she knew so well to pick up her loved ones at home. Through the tragedy of blindness, Nydia learned to walk through the darkness by relying on the sure path she had trod each day. In your despair, walk along the path you know well:

Remember the truth that set you free from sin:	Whoever hears My word and believes Him who sent Me has eternal life and will not be condemned. He has crossed over from death to life. (John 5:24, NIV)
Remember the truth about the One who set you free:	Give thanks to the LORD for He is good. His love endures forever. (Psalm 107:1, NIV)
Remember the promise from the One who is coming again:	And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. (Matt. 28:20)
Remember the glorious future awaiting all who have trusted in the LORD Jesus Christ:	I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. (Rom. 8:18, NIV)

Reflect on YOUR life: You will surely walk through the darkness of despair. But it need not end there. Let it be a time of affirmation and faith, a time of growth. Emerge from the grinding wheel of despair a brilliant gem of faith. Put your hope in God, for you will yet praise Him!