| It is unusual to hear someone say that their church went through a very
positive conflict experience recently. In fact, I have never heard
anyone mention conflict in the church in a positive manner. The closest
comment I have heard was from our pastor during one of the many conflicts
we have experienced in recent years. “We’re going to learn from this,”
he said. “We’re going to learn!” That was a positive aspect to the
pain of the moment. Yet, his comment was the only one that even approached
a positive nature. Generally, people remember the bad a whole lot
more than the good. Such is true of conflict in the church.
Yet, conflict can bring both positive and negative results.
On the negative side, conflict can have devastating effects on a local
church congregation. There is one straightforward reason. Strong
relationships are the life blood, in a sense, of local fellowship.
The church, with its spiritual nature and volunteer calling, requires strong
relationships with good teamwork and unity of purpose. Poorly managed conflict
usually severs the strong relational ties that people have with one another.
Frequently, the results of church conflict is a congregation which physically
divides. People would rather quit than fight. They would rather
find another church or give up on church altogether than to endure the
anguish of conflict. After all, goes the logic, church is supposed
to be a place of love and harmony not hatred and bickering. Damage
to relationships in conflict situations has been the downfall of many successful
church ministries.
Conflict also has other negative results. Organizational structures
within the church may become rigid and require “by the book” actions on
everyone’s part. The fellowship as a whole may become dysfunctional,
supporting inappropriate behaviors among members just to keep the peace.
An unfortunate but common result is a root of bitterness that takes hold
of people too proud to just quit the church. Their continued presence
without forgiveness and reconciliation sets up the congregation for a future
battle. There was a member in my own church who had a twenty year
dispute with the pastor. Imagine carrying around bitterness for twenty
years!
There can be many positive results from conflict, even one that has
been at times destructive. A common goal or sense of purpose can
emerge in the aftermath of conflict. Unity among believers creates
a powerful group in this world. When empowered by the Holy Spirit,
great things can be accomplished. Conflict can lead to more creative
solutions than without it. Anytime someone is challenged there will
be a heightened effort. Constructively handled conflict serves to
push people past their self-imposed limits. Similarly, well managed
conflict will lead to a stronger commitment to the solution.
Copyright 5/23/2001, Randy Lariscy. |